Episode 7: Moving from “Me” to “We” in Relationship
As an intimate relationship matures and deepens with time, it tends to strengthen in many ways. Both partners feel their bond shift towards a more familial connection, and they start to see each other less as an “other” and more as an extension of self. At the same time, this introduces new emotional aspects to the relationship; it often begins to evolve in ways that present new and more challenging conflicts.
Wounds from childhood, differences in communication patterns, and deep-set habits can all contribute to increased conflict as partners navigate the evolving landscape of their couplehood. So in this episode of The Vibrant Couple, Valdo sits down with Ryan Ginn, a men’s coach and somatic psychotherapist, to discuss the importance of moving from a self-centered perspective to a partnership-focused perspective, and how to navigate conflicts that arise in the process.
Listen to learn more!
Show Notes
01:18 – Valdo introduces today’s guest, Ryan Ginn
01:47 – Ryan discusses how the teachings of Stan Tatkin have influenced his life and work
05:25 – Analyzing the relationship container to pinpoint communication breakdown
07:46 – Shifting the relationship focus from “me” to “we” helps individual healing
09:18 – The use of intentional co-regulation as a communication tool
10:50 – On the emotional arc of a partnership from strangers to familial
12:23 – Resolving conflict through staging and scene-play
17:09 – Ryan shares a client success story related to conflict resolution
Links
Learn more about Ryan’s work on his website: https://ryanginn.com/
Follow Being Men on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/beingmeninsta/
Listen to Ryan’s podcast with Slade Machamer, The Crux: https://www.beingmen.net/podcast
Bio
Ryan Ginn is a men’s coach and somatic psychotherapist who effectively coaches individuals and couples into a more empowered and compassionate way of relating. His approach to Couples Therapy is based in both neurobiology and common sense, providing new tools for couples who want more from their relationship.
Ryan’s education includes an MA in Counseling Psychology from Saybrook University, as well as advanced somatic therapy training from the PACT Institute and the Hakomi Institute. His work is both influenced and inspired by the teachings of Stan Tatkin, developer of the Psychobiological Approach to Couple Therapy (PACT).
Ryan recently launched a new podcast called The Crux with co-host Slade Machamer, in which they discuss strategies for men to improve their relationship skills. Together they tackle the most important questions around men's experiences in relationships, with the goal of giving men real, concrete steps to help them move out of frustrating places and towards feeling more confident in their relationships.
Music
Intro music: Sukavah Bodeh by Peter Levitov & Maxime Le Royer, from their Life is Good album.